Aspects of the Entheogenic Experience: Godhead or Cosmic Consciousness
The entire experience lasted 8 hours, and in the last 4 or so hours I experienced the dissolution of my physical body, and was taken into a space of Pure Loving Awareness.
The experience does not seem to fit neatly into any one category, and names like "Godhead" seem too ambiguous. Did I experience the Godhead? Was it a death/rebirth experience? Union with everything? It felt like a little of each, but none of these. And I did experience fear at first because the world(s) which opened to me seemed more real than this one, and I thought that I would never come back to my body.
As I let go of that fear, I was given greater insight into what Unity Consciousness is, feeling as though I were just pure, bodiless awareness. The mantra that kept coming to my lips was, "Release All Limitation, and Allow More Love to Be," and it seemed that I was being told this personally, but also that it described the whole progression of the Cosmos, of all Life. I felt that I had attained Enlightenment (or touched it), and was now completely spiritually awakened. But I also realize(d) that it's a never-ending process. Next time I plan to record all or part of the session.
Swayembu - The Ayahuasca Analogue Jurema
Okay. I took only 3 hits of acid. I went into my room and noticed as I was looking at my luggage, a complete spiral that my soul was connected to. I saw God at the end of this tunnel, it felt as if my soul was wrapping around heading towards this very powerful being, along with other souls. I felt as if I was headed towards heaven. Every single time i take it, I never have a bad trip. I believe that is so because I always give people money, just because, I give them my labor for free, and I inspire people, because that is what I do best. Everytime I trip now, it's a wonderful experience, like my soul is reaching towards God. I believe in what goes around comes around, and the level of good Karma that exists in my soul comes out completely when I trip, God lets me see it. It's real. What goes around comes around.
Mr. Wolynski - acid
5 people in a very beautiful house in a crowded city all of them with one dose of lsd (one square of blotter). Intention is to have fun and it is my second lsd experience. In general entheogenic experiences it maybe the 6th. Anyway these 5 people including me starts to feel the initial effects and realize that they can actually alter the or control the hallucinations by telling each other what they see or hear or feel(actually they don't). at first it is very fun because the one who hears this actually feels what the other says. It gets out of hand here: every friend of mine (4people) thinks that i'm too naive in general so all of them starts telling bizzare or very odd things and i started feeling pushed aside and lonely. And that was the start of a very intense introspective hallucinations such as these:
1- First we decided to watch "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" which was OK at first. But special effects such as handy-cam-like blurred visions or demons and angels talking on the shoulder altered the whole concept of the movie and the subject changed in my perception and i started to feel that the movie itself was an apparatus for a divine mission that i couldn't really understand. I felt at one point that i possessed , with the help of my visual perception, a supernatural being in me.(a demon or satan or whatever you might call it)The funny thing is everybody next to me started to feel the weird energy that i had so they stopped the movie. And at that moment i started crying...
2- After crying a lot(only me crying) there was a unity among 5 of us. But the idea of a being possessed BY ME was getting a hold of me stronger every second. So i decided to lay down on a bed and just try to relax. To do that i found a blanket and got all of my body under it. I remember feeling that i was in a vast void , an emptiness, pure silence. Within a few seconds i started hearing beautiful voice of a women. i didn't see anything but i just heard a very long and melodic song. And although i just remember the very last line of the song ( and thats why i know it) it was in english. The last lines were "welcome to the world" and i started thinking that i am going to die that night. And my friends really had the worst time of their lives because of me. Because i was constantly saying that i was gonna die.
This happened in 3rd of January 07 after that i had continious auditory hallucinations and thats why i was sent to a mental hospital for 6 weeks by my parents and a psychiatrist. This was a life changing experience for me and very very special for me. I couldn't really tell whether these were "Godhead" aspects or "Visual and auditory changes" aspects of a entheogenic experience. Maybe both...JaCo - LSD
Five hours into the trip my friend said he was having a bad trip, and that he wanted something to help make it stop. In my opinion it is an insult to the experience to turn down a lesson that is being given to you. You should see what it has to say. At that moment I felt as if an eye opened up inside my mind that looked at me sternly and implored me to help this poor soul. I was scared and felt a lot of pressure, and I tried to tell my friend that I always have a hard time at a certain point in the trip, but that the key is to see what it has to tell you. When you go through and surrender you will feel as if a knot in your psyche is unwound. But he wouldn't believe me, he refused, and he closed up even further.
It felt as if I've failed in front of the eyes of a god. Broken. I reclined in my chair, looked at my brother with my eyes full of tears; asking him if he was also feeling 'that'. Then it felt as if my spine was ripped open from top to bottom like the zipper of a jacket. Everything opened up and revealed it's inside. I saw my brother ablaze with energy and was able to see all his intestines and blood flowing through him. And there was this subtle dancing snake moving through his body like a puff of smoke, entwined into moving 3d geometrical patterns. Adorned with jewel like intricacies that had the colors that were very characteristic of his personality. We hugged and we merged; my dancing cloudy snake danced with his.
Our connection was broken, and we got lost in confusion. He kept falling away from me, dissolving into this gray mass of blandness. When I called out to him his eyes appeared again and his body materialized again. But then there was this tone, a low buzz increasing in pitch, until it snapped when it was screeching, and with that we were pulled to each other with a hard jerk. It was as if I saw his thoughts represented through the movement of his smoky snake. Then the snake started to twitch, and started to look rotten. As if all the evil forces that worked into us throughout our lives was getting a hold of his soul and was wearing him down. When it almost died this black hole emerged in the centre of his face, and it ripped him away from me.
But then something opened up in me and I started to sing, and was able to pull him back and keep a hold of him. The light erupted again and we were engulfed with beautiful splendor. But when I got distracted the deterioration began again. This fluctuated on and off, until suddenly it felt safe again. My brother had a lot of things to go through and was a little catatonic, but I had the feeling it would turn out okay. I was ecstatic. When we reunited with our other friends I was connected to all of them through my smoky snake. Then I had the feeling as if I was receding into this tentacle like structure were millions of smoky snakes entwined to form a part of this super-being, but I could only fathom a fragment of it.Dreadmanneke - LSD + Marijuana
Through recent episodes I have come to realize that psilocybin, perhaps unlike other indole hallucinogens with the exception of DMT/Ayahuasca, is an entity. It's pretty hard to explain in english just how this works, and I realize that it seems to resemble the type of affect that we associate with classical descriptions of clinical schizophrenia, but I will try. First the mushroom must break you down... and so you must spend the beginning stages of your visit receeding away and out of the idea of "you". This is often accompanied, at least for me, with a great deal of anguish as I realize fully the depth of the human condition, the tragedy embedded in our futile struggle to grasp and hold to the present. Usually there is a great deal of crying. It's best if you submit and surrender, makes it a lot easier.
But once the mushroom has succeeded in erasing the illusion of self, it emerges and takes control. I'm not sure if this disincarnate spirit is one or many, or perhaps there is no real difference. One is shown how over time forces or organized energies have acted, and continue to act through humankind. These are "spirits" that are greater than any individual, but by becoming incarnate in our bodies and acts, they are made real. For me, there was an explanation and visit into the lives of many of those that I know in order to witness the power of these forces or spirits. Many of these revelations had to do with sexuality and gender, so I should probably keep them to myself. I would describe it as a type of experience similar to the guided tour given Jimmy Stewart in "It's a Wonderful Life". One of the central messages seemed to be that language is insufficient to describe the motives of these forces...that to label something as "bad" or "evil" is a reflection merely of the linear logic employed by humans to grok their own limited cognitive landscapes. Another communication was a reflection on the nature of "home". The lesson was carried through the hackneyed phrase "home is where the heart is". I was shown that the heart is in many places, and so there is no one place that home can be. Additionally, the heart was seen as being at odds with itself, and this type of environment was not the greatest place to live or make a home. This resulted in the realization that home was exactly where I was at that moment, which happened to be sitting in my bathtub/shower in near total darkness.
The final lesson was a demonstration of how different powers can be manifest through symbols, slogans, voice, and hortatory speechmaking-which was a little spooky because this often can lead to mass genocide or authoritarian dictatorships. But again, there was a sort of reminder that power is just power, and although it maybe propelled into destructive potential, it inherently is neither good nor bad.
Q - Psilocybin
I was about 4 or 5 hours into the trip when i started copying the movements and mannerisms of a friend who was with me. The more I did it, the more i felt like i was watching my reflection in the mirror. I felt that by looking into someone’s eyes, consciousness was seeing itself. The more I did this, the more the details of the room faded away until there was nothing left but eyes and white light, and I heard voices I did't recognize. They were very excited that someone was going to "wake up" if they just kept following the train of thought they were on. When i realized they were talking about me I got scared and stopped because I was too exhausted to deal with anything more intense. If I had kept going, I don't know what would have happened. It was one of the most exciting, but terrifying experiences of my life. Once I realized I could stop it if i wanted to, the terror went away. It was just so unfamiliar.
Tommy Wangyal - LSD + Marijuana
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